Randomness

Ever have a day when you are just completely and utterly exhausted? A day when, no matter how much work you have to do, and how quickly a deadline might be creeping up on you, you can barely keep your eyes open long enough to register that you actually ARE at work, sitting in front of your computer? That's how I'm feeling today, and all I am able to really concentrate on is trying to figure out what in my cubicle would make a suitable pillow. Since our "company" moved to a new building and we were forced to give up our cozy offices in favor of teeny, supposedly more efficient cubicles, the option of a power nap has gone straight out the window. Not that I have a window, but you get where I'm coming from, right? Dang, I miss my old office. It was large, and quiet, and when I shut the door and turned off the light it became pitch-black. Back then, everyone would take power naps, 15 minutes here, 10 minutes there. It was a brief respite from the monotony of our daily work, and it helped us get through the tediousness of the rest of our day. Now? Now I can't close my eyes for 30 seconds without nervously tearing them back open and looking about, just in case someone saw me daring to take a break. Don't get me wrong, I am in no way working non-stop from 9 to 5. But actually getting a few minutes of legitimate shut-eye is out of the question. First of all, it's bright in here. Not outdoors bright, or even doctor's office bright...I'm talking surface of the sun bright. It's also cold and noisy, with an unidentifiable hum that is constantly operating somewhere on the floor. I have never found the source...although I'm nearly positive that it's the sound of souls dying. My cubicle is 8 feet by 4 feet, grey, and with surprisingly short walls that allow me to view the daily work habits of Mr. DJ, my asshole co-worker. One of these days I am going to post about Mr. DJ, when I have the time and energy. Right now I'll just say he's a total freakazoid, and leave it at that.

Anyway, back to my cubicle. Like I said, it's grey and drab, but I have attempted to perk the environment up with random McDonald's toys and black and white pictures I printed up on company paper. I have a little plaque that says,"ADVERSITY doesn't build character, it reveals it", which I thought was really deep and insightful the first few hundred times I looked at it. Not so much anymore, but it sure beats an empty fabric-covered wall. I also have a picture of my husband and me, back before I got a job with the government and my whole life was ahead of me, and I'm looking hot in it, so that picks me up a little. Underneath my desk is a pair of ratty slippers that I walk around in. It's really amusing to see the faces of my co-workers when they realize what the lime-green blobs covering my feet are. Without exception, they tell me,"Wow, I wish I could wear slippers at work", because apparently you need really big balls to make an attempt at comfort while trudging through eight hours of meaninglessness (I don't care if that's a word or not).

And here it is, almost 1 o'clock, and I am staring at a pile of paperwork, trying to psych myself up to work all the way through until 5. I wonder if my health insurance will cover a fake-suicide attempt...