Friday, February 29, 2008

You Are What You Eat (And You Smell Like It Too)

Is it possible to O.D. on canned tuna? I'm asking because I have this co-worker who eats three to four cans of tuna, sometimes mixed with a bowl of white rice, over the course of one workday. Every day. He also ingests protein shakes and various vitamin supplements (dude, he, like, works out), but it's the massive amounts of tuna that make me want to vomit. He opens these cans and the odor is sent wafting out of our little office kitchen and over the walls of our cramped grey pens. Three to four times a day. How healthy can this possibly be for my co-worker, who will hereafter be referred to as Chickenlegs of the Sea? I swear, this guy must have gallons of mercury coursing through his veins.

In my mind, I'm convinced that his skeleton is coated in metal, kind of like Wolverine but without the strength, snark and sex appeal.

5 comments:

Sarah said...

I'm not so sure about people, but I know cats can get really sick if you give them too much tuna. Does he look feline at all? Maybe he'll die and the problem will solve itself.

I once worked with a lady who cooked an entire tray of lasagna with Limburger cheese in our office kitchen. It smelled for several weeks. It was not cool.

Anonymous said...

My husband has a cousin who was a professional bodybuilder for a time. One year after we had all gorged ourselves on Thanksgiving dinner and were lying about the den like slugs, his cousin sat down and proceeded to eat a banana and tuna straight from the can together. It took everything we had in us not to upchuck our turkey and stuffing patties.

litelysalted said...

Haha! Um, is his name Warner and do you work at Pindar in King of Prussia, PA? Because I think I know that guy.

Although, I used to feel bad for him because whenever he'd be eating his stinky tuna and someone who wasn't aware of the "Warner Situation" would walk by, they'd be all like, "Ugh!! What's that smell?!"

The Domina said...

I think at this point you could take your temperature with him!

TK said...

HELLOOOOOOOO?

Anyone?

Hello?

Well, this thing died quick.

[sigh]